Mothering From The Heart - March 19, 2013

Sometimes I feel like a mean mom when I'm around other Christian moms and I'm the one being firm and other women seem as if they are trying to lovingly get their child to obey. I know I need to be kind to my children but my children don't respond well to "hey sweetie, could you please get off the table?" But rather "get off the table right now" . Do I just need to get over what orher people are doing and continue on as I have been or is this not a good approach? Also, how often does a child need a reminder of, if you don't do such and such I'll have to spank you or is that constant reminder not needed. My children are almost 3 and 4.

 My (5 year old daughter) is dealing with some severe heart hurting issues.  All of the little girls in our church are very very mean to her.  I am not exaggerating.  There are only 4 other little girls her age in the church and they deliberately leave her out, physically push her, tell her that she is a whiny baby, and tell her that they don't want to play with her.  Last night at church she asked to give one of the girls a hug and another little girl pushed her away and said, "No! She doesn't want you to touch her!" My very sensitive, touchy-feely little girl's heart is breaking.  We have considered talking to the moms of the other little girls, but when we did that concerning our oldest daughter, it made it even worse (the mom telling her kids that we were awful and mean, thus being even more "catty" to my daughter).  It is extremely juvenile and I can't stand it.  We just moved here last summer and it seems impossible to "break into" the little tiny cliques that have been formed here since birth. I know it sounds absurd and exaggerated, but this is a VERY small town and is unlike any place we've lived. We've considered taking her out of her Sunday School class, Sunday night class, and Wednesday night class, but we feel like that would make her heart hurt, too, feeling like she is left out.  She knows that when she is in a group including her big sister, that she is ok, b/c her sister makes sure she is included, but she doesn't have big sister in every class.  This has been going on for 8 months, and she has lost her happy-go-lucky nature.  She is depressed a lot and cries a lot.  She so desperately wants a friend.  Just one! What do we do?  

I have a 3 year old granddaughter who when she is tired or doesn’t get her way she screams and I tried a spanking after she hit me in her angry mood but she wouldn’t stop screaming and crying  ( I had taken her out of the store due to her bad behavior and not listening, running off etc.) she cried and screamed all the way  home (I ignored it until  till she fell asleep )  – how is the best way to handle this?   Thank you.